My Favorite and Least Favorite Films of 2009

Let's face facts: 2009 was a pretty shitty year for movies. I don't care what the box office totals dictate, there weren't enough movies of quality to make me say that it was an okay year at best. Sure, there were great films out there. More often than not, though, mediocrity ruled the day. Now, a lot of people are okay with mediocrity. Witness the stellar grosses on "The Hangover", "Taken", "The Blind Side" and "Avatar" (Yeah, I called "Avatar" mediocre. It's my site. Don't like it? Blow.).

The following list are my favorite, and not so favorite, films of 2009. I refuse to use the terms "Best" and "Worst" because 1) no one critic's list is the final word on what is good and what is not and 2) I'm sure there are some fantastic movies playing out there that I haven't seen. And while I am pretty sure there are films that sucked more than films 3-10 on my least favorite list, I am also pretty sure that there isn't anything worse than "Transformers 2" or "G.I. Joe". If there is, I don't want to know about it.

My faves of 2009:

1. Up (Pixar/Disney)

The best studio in Hollywood (Pixar, not Disney) caps off a near-perfect decade with this wonderfully entertaining comedy adventure that features the year’s oddest couple, a terrific message about never giving up on your dreams as well as what may be the most moving sequence ever to appear in an animated feature released by the Mouse House.

2. The Hurt Locker (Summit Entertainment)

The problem with so many war films is that the filmmaker’s political beliefs get in the way of their storytelling. Not so with Kathryn Bigelow’s intense, exhilarating account of thirty days in the lives of a bomb disposal unit stationed in Iraq. Jeremy Renner and Anthony Mackie give remarkable performances in a film that manages to show the horrors of war and honor those who deal with it on a regular basis without shoving a message down our throats in the process.

3. Up in the Air (Paramount Pictures)

Jason Reitman takes another major leap forward as a filmmaker with this terrific –and timely- comedy/drama, made even better thanks to a trio of award-worthy performances from George Clooney, Vera Farmiga and Anna Kendrick. Many were turned off by the somewhat unlikeable characters and third act. It’s okay. They can go take solace in safety-scissor films like “The Blind Side” or “Avatar” if they like (just teasing, kids).

4. Inglourious Basterds (Weinstein Company/Universal)

Quentin Tarantino’s bloody good revenge film set during World War II isn’t all that different than his previous films, and that is definitely a good thing. Who would have thought that “Hostel” director Eli Roth would be responsible for one of 2009’s funniest scenes?

5. Fantastic Mr. Fox (20th Century Fox)

Wes Anderson goes animated for his latest feature, a terrifically funny adaptation of the Roald Dahl children’s novel. Employing stop-motion animation, Anderson’s unique filmmaking style suits the animation genre wonderfully, nicely supported by the voice talents of George Clooney, Meryl Streep, Bill Murray, Willem DaFoe and Michael Gambon. You wrote a bad song, Petey, a bad song!

6. Star Trek (Paramount Pictures)

Who would have thought that the man who brought us “Felicity” and “Alias” would be responsible for bringing “Star Trek” back from the franchise dead? Well, that is exactly what J.J. Abrams did with this origin story set in an alternate timeline. The rare big-budget event film that delivered everything it promised and more. The next installment can’t come soon enough.

7. Adventureland (Miramax Pictures)

Greg Mottola’s excellent coming-of-age in the late ‘80s tale is partly based on his late teen years, and is one that anyone who grew up then can relate to. Miramax Pictures royally screwed up this film’s release last spring, attempting to sell it as the next “Superbad”. It’s anything but: it’s better.

8. District 9 (Tri-Star Pictures)

Abandoned aliens living in Johannesburg provide the premise for one of the more intelligent and engrossing science-fiction films to have come out of Hollywood in quite some time. Neil Blomkamp’s debut feature might turn into a standard action film during its final half hour, but by that point you’ll find yourself too immersed in the characters and story to care.

9. (500) Days of Summer (Fox Searchlight)

The romantic comedy is given a fresh spin in this frequently funny, often hilarious, film from director Marc Webb. Webb’s unique approach to the story, coupled with winning chemistry from leads Zooey Deschanel and Joseph Gordon Levitt, help offset this film from the rest of the indie love story pack.

10. Anitchrist (IFC Films)

I know that the latest Lars Von Trier cinematic “love-in” will probably land on more worst than best ten lists, and I can easily see why: this is one punishing movie experience. But in a year where people are considering the visually stunning but pedestrian “Avatar” as the second coming of cinema, I am only more than happy to put myself through Lars’ onscreen therapy. At least I felt something while I was watching it.

Runner ups: Coraline, State of Play, Still Walking, Capitalism-A Love Story, Where the Wild Things Are

My least favorite films of 2009:

1) Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen (Paramount/Dreamworks)

One doesn’t go into a “Transformers” movie looking for anything deep or substantial. You look for just enough of a coherent plot and tons of action, which the 2007 original had just enough of to make it work. This sequel could even manage those two things. Instead, we got 150 agonizing minutes of racial stereotypes, horrible comedy and action that was incomprehensible even by Michael Bay’s standards. Don’t bother asking what the film was about, I couldn’t tell you. In fact, I doubt Bay could even tell you. The embodiment of everything that is wrong today with American filmmaking.

2) G.I. Joe: the Rise of Cobra (Paramount)

Not quite the 24-frame per second abortion that “Transformers” was, but it was close. Channing Tatum wins the 2009 Pinocchio Award for least charismatic lead in Stephen Sommers’ $175 million live-action cartoon that felt longer than "Berlin Alexanderplatz". Yo, you blow, Joe.

3) Terminator: Salvation (Warner Brothers)

This could have been good: a film that dealt with the beginning of the Future War that was hinted at in each of the previous “Terminator” films. Instead, in the hands of McG, all we get is two hours of explosions, incomprehensible storytelling and a cast sleepwalking through it all. Hopefully, this series is now terminated.

4) X-Men Origins: Wolverine (20th Century Fox)

The good news is that this “X-Men” prequel wasn’t as awful as 2006’s “The Last Stand”. The bad news? It still sucked. Those franchise blades are getting pretty dull there, bub.

5) Land of the Lost (Universal Pictures)

As bad as the previews made it out to be, this laugh-free cinematic update of the equally crappy 1970s television show was like a waking nightmare. Hopefully someone at Universal Pictures got fired over approving production on this $100 million turkey. It’s time for a career intervention, Will Ferrell.

6) The Lovely Bones (Paramount/Dreamworks)

Peter Jackson stumbles horrifically with this uninvolving adaptation of Alice Siebold’s bestselling novel. Despite the best efforts of the cast (Stanley Tucci is suitably creepy in his role), the film lumbers on for two agonizing hours without the slightest bit of emotional involvement or payoff. Get back to Middle Earth, Peter. It’s where you belong.

7) Angels & Demons (Sony Pictures)

Tom Hanks got a better haircut for this follow up to the worst film of 2006, “The Da Vinci Code”, but that is probably the only improvement found in this silly sequel, complete with an ending worthy of an episode of “Scooby Doo”. Okay, this film was roughly five minutes shorter than “Code”, so I guess it had that going for it.

8) Funny People (Universal Pictures)

Judd Apatow’s Day Off.

9) Sunshine Cleaning (Overture Films)

A cloying independent film that crams practically every cliché you can think of into 95 minutes. A waste of a good cast and the viewer’s valuable time, this film is nothing more than a Lifetime Network film with widescreen framing.

10) Monsters vs. Aliens (Dreamworks)

Another animated dud from Dreamworks Animation, this box office hit showed potential to be a fun riff on 1950s sci-fi B-movies, but never followed through. Chock full of stale jokes and somewhat uninspired voice acting, “Aliens” shows once again that no matter how much money they throw into a cartoon, they will never be mistaken for Pixar.